Tag: 2015

Motherhood Moments: Great Expectations

I’m not used to taking things easy.
When I first had Big E my whole world changed, including what was possible in the outdoors. All day hikes to the top of mountains were fun with just adults in tow, but once a baby was involved diaper changes and feedings changed what I did in the outdoors. Maybe an all day hike up a mountain was out, but I could still put the baby in the pack and get out for a hike.

Then Big E grew. Suddenly he wanted to toddle everywhere without being strapped into a pack. So we adapted, changed our expectations and went on short adventures or stroller accessible activities.
Then little g was born. We had to adapt again. Learn how to have two kids and balance their needs and mine was another learning curve that affected what we did in the outdoors. But Big E was bigger and could actually walk on his own now. We could still get outdoors, just at a toddler’s level.
Now there’s another one. Baby L is still in the floppy stage, unable to even sit up on her own. While adorable and lovable in every way, her lack of motor skills requires another redefinition of acceptable outdoor activity. And it’s tough.
With this hot weather I long to go kayaking with my family. We live near a great tubing river, but having a completely dependent child makes that activity too dangerous to contemplate.
Biking would be another fun alternative, but my bike trailer requires an infant insert and says it’s only suitable for children over six months. Summer will be over by the time Baby L is six months.
Another family favorite is off-roading. Mountain Dad loves driving the RZR but laws (and common sense) require all children to wear helmets and Baby L has just barely figured out how to hold up her head. I can’t imagine what it would be like wearing a heavy helmet, not to mention I don’t think her car seat would work in an off road vehicle.
I thought I had figured out that having kids requires adaptation to my life. I have learned to walk at a slower pace, to plan ahead, to change the activities from white water rafting to short hikes near to home. We’ve bought special gear, taken more time, given up when appropriate. But I still have to lower my expectations.
I’m not asking for much. It’s not like I’m an extreme athlete running Iron man triathlons every weekend. And I know all too well that babies grow and this will be temporary. That doesn’t change the chasm between what I WANT to do outdoors and what I’m ABLE to do outdoors.
Getting outdoors with young kids is tough, but I know I will keep trying, changing and adapting, because it is also important.

Motherhood Moments: Summer Mentality

As an adult there’s no such thing as a summer vacation. Not like as a kid when summer was full of lazy days, playing with friends and a long break from any responsibility. As an adult you’re still expected to work every day even though the weather is beautiful and you’d rather be lying in a hammock.

That’s why I was so surprised when last week suddenly felt like summer. Like lazy day, laid back, kid summer. Maybe it was because Big E had his last day of kindergarten or maybe it was just beautiful days of sun and warm weather, but something changed from the mundane. And it was awesome.

I found myself planning a barbeque for family dinner, spending time in the garden, swimming with my kids, and hiking to a nearby creek. When opportunities to be outside arose I took them and put off my regular work (and blogging too). I appreciated the warmth and fun and happy vibe.

I was happier just being outdoors playing with my kids. And doing that I realized that my kids have a Summer Mentality ALL THE TIME! Here’s one lesson I can learn from them. Their outlook is always to look for the fun whether it’s playing with rocks or splashing in a stream. Is there a way I could look for fun even in the work I do? Can I have a Summer Mentality all the time?

Life requires work, which by definition isn’t very fun. Laundry, for example. The constant pile of dirty clothes on the floor of my kids’ rooms does not contribute to a laid back, happy, summer mentality mom. But is there a way I could look for fun while doing the laundry? 

I’m not sure if this will work all the time but here are some things I’ve tried to help focus on the things that really matter (like my kids) and off the things that don’t (like cleaning the house).

1. Go somewhere. When I’m at home with my kids I can easily ignore them. When we’re out in nature I’m much more interested in what they’re thinking, saying and playing.

2. Break a dreaded task down into 100 steps. If there’s something I’m avoiding, like cleaning out the garage, it helps to write out the project into micro steps. One – gather garbage bags. Two – walk outside. Three – open garage door. Etc.

3. Lower expectations. I don’t need a clean house. I can live without tackling the home renovation project we had planned. If my family is healthy and happy that’s good enough for me.

As I try harder to have a summer mentality I hope it will make life a little happier and more relaxed. That will be best for everyone.

The Worst Campout Ever

Last weekend Mountain Dad and I were excited to get outdoors on the first campout of the season. That excitement blinded us to the fact that camping with a two month old, three year old and six year old in the rain may be a tougher task than we were able to handle. We so wanted to get out! So what that the forecast called for rain all weekend. Surely it wouldn’t actually rain all weekend?

Thus began the worst campout ever. It started with rain while packing up, a registration mistake requiring a trip to the DMV and indecision on the destination. Our camping confidence was artificially inflated and instead of taking the downpour and DMV as omens of a terrible weekend we plowed on, thinking of the promises made to the preschooler and kindergartener.

We had decided to go to Fruita, Colorado because of its off road and mountain bike trails. Then the weather made us consider a destination in Southern Utah, but we ended up in Fruita after trusting too much on our phone’s up to the minute satellite weather report and taking a detour into a blizzard. Well, not quite but pretty cold and slushy.

We arrived late and hungry, set up camp and had a fire. I spent most of my time taking care of Mountain Baby leaving Mountain Dad and his brother to start a fire, set up tents, prepare dinner, cook, wash dishes and entertain Big E, little g and their cousin Eden.

Over the next few days the problems continued. We got lost. Little g refused to use the pit toilet. Rain kept us in the tent. One morning Big E puked. Mountain Baby needed to be held, fed and changed at the most inconvenient times. Kids fought. Parents were exhausted. We packed up in the rain. And on the drive back I had a minor accident, bending the metal on the trailer’s wheel well, just to add a rancid cherry on top of an already putrid cake.

Never before have I had such a hard time camping. Our family enjoys camping. We’re normally good at it. We have good gear. We eat good food. We all have fun. But sometimes it’s just not worth the extra work. Now I know. There is a point where getting outdoors just isn’t worth the extra effort.

I’m counting this trip as a learning experience. It would’ve been better to disappoint the kids and stay home on this one, but we couldn’t have known that when we started out. Now I’m implementing a three strikes policy. If three unforeseen problems arise on our next camping adventure it’s a sign that it’s not meant to be.

For the Love of Mom Contest

What is a blog if not a place to brag and what better person to brag about than Mom?

I’m proud to be a winner in the For The Love of Mom blog post contest hosted by Tales of a Mountain Mama. My guest blog post I’ll Always Need a Mother is live today. Please go check it out!

While you’re there make sure to enter Amelia’s awesome Mother’s Day Giveaways. Just nominate a mom in your life for some amazing prizes.

Happy Mother’s Day to all!